Dear Bear, Is there a way to deal with a friend break-up if the friend just slowly but completely excludes you from their life instead of acknowledging something hurt them and discussing it? I don’t know what’s going on. This person has not responded to…

Hi Bear! I’ve known I was bi since I was 16 and fell in love with a girl who was strictly straight and conservative which did not end well, but hey it was life experience despite how hard it was. But because of that, I’ve…

Dear Bear, When we first met, my close friend (we’ll call her Enid for privacy) had recently been cheated on and dumped by her boyfriend of four years. She was going through a lot of heartbreak and self esteem issues at that time, so she…

Dear Bear, My uncle has just died and that’s very sad for me. We liked each other a lot and often spent the hard parts of family gatherings doing chores and escaping from our other relatives which neither of us ever liked very much. I…

Dear Bear, It’s about to be New Year’s Eve, and everyone is posting their #instagrambest9 and making resolutions and so forth and I mostly want to hide under my bed. The world is a shit fire, I’ve had a really hard year personally, and also…

Dear Bear, I’m part of a friend group that’s pretty close and does a lot of things together even though we don’t all live in the same city anymore (we call ourselves The Breakfast Club though we’re really now more like The Big Chill without…

Dear Bear, As of a couple months ago, I am a college graduate (yay!). I went to a good school, worked my ass off, and got a good job doing something like doing and am steadily getting better at. The problem is that most of…

Dear Bear, My situation is simple but awful. My mother really really hates my husband, Mike*. She says he’s lazy and stupid and selfish and all kinds of other things that just aren’t true. He’s not perfect but no one is. She certainly isn’t. But…

The allure of the forbidden is real, and we should probably usually resist it, but human beings are human. Dear Bear, I had sex with someone I probably should not have had sex with. Specifically, I had sex with the husband of my PhD advisor….

Dear Bear, What the fuck are we supposed to do now? • • • Dear Brave Correspondent, I think this is a very reasonable question. What’s more, I think that it pretty well echoes what a lot of people are thinking right now. In this…

Dear Bear, I have started a great new-ish relationship. It’s sweet and hot and exciting and all the good things and I feel really good about it. However, I am resisting telling people about it and/or reluctant to discuss it even though I’m happy because…

Dear Bear, My boss said something so stupid and sexist and actually really rapey the other day, again, and I called him on it right there in the meeting. He said, “I’m sorry if you were offended.” He seems to think that’s an apology and…

Dear Bear, Is “this just isn’t enough fun for me” a legit reason to leave somebody? My partner and I have been together a few years and this relationship stressor continues to come up. He likes TV and movies. While I enjoy a (literal) Netflix…

Dear Bear, I think my good friend (we can call her “Molly”) is in trouble and I’m not sure what to do or how to help her. Recently she has been drunk (I think, maybe on some other drugs but acting in a way that…

Dear Bear, For the past couple of years, I’ve been in an on/off relationship with an older man. He’s charming, sexy, funny, and clever. On a good day we have such a loving, meaningful connection; we’ve supported each other through hard times, and bonded over…

Dear Bear, I’m a butch approaching thirty who doesn’t drink and never really has. I’m now feeling conflicted about whether or not I should start. The reasons for my abstinence have been partly situational: I grew up in a family where very little alcohol was…

Dear Bear, I am in a relationship and I can’t tell if it is struggling or if I am self-sabotaging. There are two major factors: multiple stressful life events and my own lack of emotional depth and/or emotional self-awareness. I am not very self-aware in…

Dear Bear, I am pregnant! It’s so marvelous. I’m a femme-identified ciswoman and I’m married to a somewhat butchier ciswoman who is THE greatest human who has ever lived. She is so loving to the cats and so patient with me. And she’s so good…

Dear Bear, My partner and I are fretting over taking our 7-year-old to SF Pride. After Orlando and the person arrested with intent to harm LA Pride, it is hard to not feel that SF Pride is a target. Were it just a 20-something me,…

Dear Bear, I’m hoping you can help me figure out what to do. I am about to graduate from college. I really wasn’t sure what I wanted to do after school. I was pre-med and did well and got into a good med school, but…